I had never really questioned why I had diabetes. I guess I figured that questioning it wouldn't make it go away or make it any better. But for some reason lately I have been wondering what my life would be like if I didn't have diabetes. Would I go to the school that I go to now? Would I have climbed a 14,000 ft mountain? Would I have ran a half marathon? Would I have meet all of my amazing diabetic friends? Would I have the faith I do? Would I be as responsible? Would I have good grades? Or would I understand how precious and delicate life is and how fast it can be taken away? The one thing that most people don't know about me is how much an observer I am. Anything I do I am always thinking of what its effects will be on my life. That's probably why I have been so curious lately on what my life would be like if I didn't have diabetes. But truly I don't think I want to know. To think of all the things that diabetes has allowed me to do and to think of all the people I have meet I definitely am sure that nothing in my life would be the same. I guess in some ways I owe a lot to Diabetes. Wow how crazy does that sound?
I know one thing that would be different--there would be an older diabetic gentleman who is very special to me, who probably wouldn't be wearing this cool insulin "pod" that communicates wirelessly with his monitor. You gave him the inspiration to give up "control" of his diabetes to the pumps and the doctor who taught him a very different system than he learned nearly 40 years ago...I believe that because of you Missy, I still have my Daddy here with me. You helped him to climb a mountain of uncertainty, and start a new race in his life with diabetes. For that, I will always thank you! Love ya sweetie! Barb :)
ReplyDeleteNot crazy at all! This is so beautiful, Miss Ash! I'm right there with ya. And your list of "Would I" questions will just keep growing, too! "Would I have learned how to surf?" up next? :-)
ReplyDeleteashlee you are one amazing person. And i don't think thats crazy... diabetes have given more strength and given you such a stronger faith!
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Ashlee,
ReplyDeleteI have asked the same questions, and come to the same conclusion. I don't know what it is like not to have it, but I question whether I would have experienced all the amazing things that I have if I didn't have it.
I know that I would not have made all of the amazing friends that I have made if I wasn't diagnosed, and I don't know that I would take every challenge with the same intensity as I do if I didn't have it. The fact is, every day is a challenge, but that just provides the opportunity to overcome challenges.
Keep up all the great work, and keep writing.
John